Big Parasite

Big Parasite

Okay greetings brothers and sisters this Is Monday September 18th so I'm not sure When this video is going to be up Probably today I don't know here Tomorrow This is just an introduction and they're Not going to add something I did a Voiceover last night but I'm going to Add to it uh You know today and then hopefully this Is done for me this talking about this Situation in person or whatever but I Had a reaction that is Positive like post putting the video up And making the video and connecting with That person and his energy and all these Things was not beneficial it kind of Sucked I went through like You know I mean some physical Issues and just uh Like spiritual heaviness grossness but I Did some of the Sittings on the you know gratefulness Meditation Channel that I have up and you know it Was really helpful last night I felt Great And I felt great really all day Yesterday felt better Um Relieved and I get into why that is The parasitic element I'll talk about That

In my first voiceover that I did Yesterday and then I'll add to it after This after that So um we discovered two days ago Our dogs have fleas and you know well Which is you know an interesting Parallel And they've been itching for a while and My wife you know we didn't see any fleas On them she knows more about than I do She's had you know more dogs than I have And you know we're doing things to Get rid of them without using you know Toxic chemicals or whatever But you know when you have something Like that right fleas or Lice or ticks or anything they some kind Of parasitic element You don't ask the things feelings When you have to extricate it from your Environment right And you don't care about the things Feelings you don't care about it's You know whatever it's it's a negative You have to get rid of you know I had Somebody write to me years and years ago You know back when I paid more attention To the comments because I didn't get so Many of them and you know I've had Billions of comments now over the years So You know you change the way that you I mean you just have to put less energy Into the things and less importance into

Them The more you get them the more they're Commonplace right But the person commented saying you know I was just getting so negative the Person was saying that about themselves Uh feeling negative In terms of listening to truther videos In you know my videos And had to take a break and I said well You don't have to listen to my videos or Anybody else's like you just don't have To like they're not you know you get Sucked into the truth community And it can have a negative effect on you Because there's very little solution Some of it's information that you need Like the initial part of it when you're Just understanding The power in the system that controls Your life and you're dependent on And so then you have to You know see what you're going to do With that information but A lot of people in the truth Community Use fear and anger And you know they play on your emotions And there's you know informative videos And then there's anger or fear videos And then there's You know I mean there's a whole host of Different Perspectives but you know for me here I strive to remove any sort of emotion

And I'm not playing on people's emotions I'm gonna try and scare people I'm not trying to you know make them Angry I'm not you know When I talk about somebody I don't want To go stock their some celebrity and Harass them you know I don't want those Things That's not the intention of my channel You know what I learned from the QBs you Know a little bit with flat Earth There's The cubes was more organized and more Energized but you know very similar And when they would do like gang Stalking and you know they would get Into all this stuff and they just wanted Drama and You know conflict you know and then Other just individual people The channels that create drama and fear And you know angst and all these things Make people feel negatively do better Which is a sad State of Affairs In fact the gross or something is you Know you talk about like pop music and You know some of the you know music Videos that are demonic and things And the grosser things are The more people gravitate to them right People run away from Purity and simple Some you know Simplicity and they run Away from God and they always are Running towards the devil even though

They claim you're even religious people Because for the modern internet addicted Person God is boring Divinity is boarding wholesome is for You you know doing things that are Traditional is boring right people need Stimulation And so people get sucked into the drama And they're feeling bad they get sucked Into channels and people that you know Claim to be truthers and I'm not talking Specifically about this one person I'm Saying this is a plague on the truth Community But if people experience my videos And they feel bad afterwards You know I talk about how the system Can't be saved and that idea in itself Is a bummer and can be terrifying Because we're 100 dependent on it right And then you have to you know think About you know you'll contemplate your Own death or just you know maybe worse That's on a situation that might be Worse than death right In terms of like the chaos and the you Know imagine what it would be like if The system collapsed right now and there Was no like Law and Order and there was No you know and people were just running Around fear-based I mean look at what Happened during covid with people you Know going to the grocery store and

I'm buying every of every sheet of Toilet paper they could get and canned Goods and all the rest of it you know When things go south People panic and then things get worse As bad as governments are chaos is worse And so um You know that's terrifying for people But I don't put emotion into it I'm not Saying it to terrify people I'm saying It because You know that's what I believe to be the Truth but if that's like terrifying for People and you know there's they get Bummed out when they're watching my Channel And I'm like why would you do that right Why would you do something that like You're You Know It's upsetting you it's Causing you to function worse it's Something that every truther goes Through by the way like you know where You're feeling negative and you feel cut Off from other people and you know it's Like ever people are all sheeple and They're all you know and it's not a good Situation right Where like it's just um You feel bad and you can't do anything About it and like it's just And there are a lot of people like Alex Jones the chicken littles they're saying The sky is falling all the time but They're not you know and giving you a

Lot of emotion and you know it's just it Draws people in and you know they're Well I gotta find out what that is we're Gonna find out what's going to happen to Me right so You know and it's just uh It's cyclical because it doesn't do Anything you're not preparing for Anything and you're not you know it's Draining you of your you know your Prada Your your Creative Energy and all these Other things you know you have to Evaluate How things affect you like when you go To a bar And you felt good when you're at the bar Maybe you know I mean you know An alcoholic experience right that's What it is you're having a you know and Uh you know alcohol creates a Uh all these things are some sort of are Toxins all the things that caffeine and Any kind of drug and any kind of Stimulant Usually they're poisons and they you Usually impair some part of your Your brain or your body or both Alcohol impairs your you know pairs all Kinds of things in your body causes your Body to function worse you can't see as Well you're uncoordinated you lose the Ability to self-perceive it it's one of The first things in your brain the part Of you that allows you to see see uh

Yourself as others see you disappears That's why people act like so foolish When they're on alcohol And you know it's a depressant and all These things And then the next day you you know wake Up and you have the after effects The Hangover the the toxicity in your body And all these things And you know people keep on going back To it Whatever it might be you gotta determine Whether something's helping you and or Hurting you and how it affects you and Most people don't think about it that Way they just do something habitually And you know that goes now with the Truth community and they just go into it And you know absorb negative energy and Then wonder why they feel bad right And so that's the introduction I'll now Do the end of the video voice over And hopefully I'm done with this subject Matter but I wanted to report to people Like how I felt afterwards Because it was a positive feeling And I'll get into that um you know what Got into it yesterday and I'll finish it Up now and then hopefully this will be My last Video on this subject with um you know This person in the situation because you Know it hasn't had a positive effect on Me and I'm glad it's over I'm glad

You know wherever constitutes uh this Relationship is done okay so um I've Done all the voiceovers I was just about To publish a video and I realize there's One important point I wanted to say And I'll add it here closer to the Beginning of the video I don't need people to tell me what he's Doing like I don't need him I don't need To hear what he's saying you know people Left comments in the beginning and uh The first day and said he's you know Saying all these things about you and They were horrible things and so they're Not going to get worse than that you Know whatever he was this caricatures That he was making of me uh you know They're not going to get worse than that They didn't bother me in the first place Like I you know the relief that I'm Feeling from and I'll get into that and These voiceovers but you know I sort of Want to jump ahead of myself but I don't Need to hear about it like you don't Need to you know are we saying this I Don't need like people spying on him Like I you know I could go find these These things and and watch them and I Have no interest in it like I don't Know he's doing whatever he's doing has Nothing to do with me like it's again It's a character his caricature of me Which I talk about here somewhere in This video

And so it's not me like it's you know It's him it's like a reflection of his Inner world that he's you know spiraling And spewing out all this stuff that's Really about him and defining him as a Person it has nothing to do with me You know so I don't need to be involved Like I don't need to know I don't care You know don't tell me don't care I Don't need to know and one more thing I Saw a comment I think yesterday Where a person said that I'm getting More views on this video Than I have in a while because I used The big parasite's name And you know like I was using this to Get more views And if anybody knows anything about me I I don't believe more is better You know quality is better than quantity You know if people are coming from his Thing or these once the trolls that hate Him and like the you know people with Drama with him I mean it's not long Lasting you know I'm not I didn't make The video for views like I didn't you Know I didn't think about any of those things And it's not I mean it's got ten Thousand views you know I used to get Videos that had millions of views back When YouTube used to not you know hide My channel on other people's Channels With their you know distorted algorithms

And it didn't make my life better like Views are You know in terms of the it's important In terms of the you know the the amount Of AD revenue and things like that but This is a a short-lived thing right like It's not going to benefit this Channel Or me long term in terms of the the Views a lot of people are coming just to See the the drama and that's not I'm not I want a drama channel so like we just Don't think you know they just view Stuff like if I want to be clear about That right that this is something that I Had to do and you know views and you Know attention on my channel isn't you Know it was never a goal of this thing Right never something that you know that I saw as being beneficial and it's not All right here's my original narrative From last night Okay um greetings brothers and sisters So This thing with um The artist formerly known as Big Bear Who I now will refer to as big parasite From now on And I'm not saying that To be mean or to Great conflict or these Things I'm saying that because That's what he is to me you know I feel Like really good Having him not be my fan anymore Like I didn't know like I had no idea

I had no idea Before this all happened That I would feel this great about him Not being my fan like it's better that He's making up lies about me and saying Stuff and spewing hate towards some Imaginary version of me He says him and his buddies are going to Spam my chat all these things like That's actually preferable to him being My fan like that's how bad it was and I Had no idea because I had no contact With him let me just start by saying This you know I'm done with this whole Thing and this is not a continuation of Me you know whatever saying what I had To say to him or his community because That's over with and I was glad to move On I wasn't going to say anything else About this and just ignore whatever came My way because I was glad to have it over with right But there have been residual positive Effects for me which I realized today You know I had a headache yesterday in Those three or four days that I was Focused on him the last couple weeks Since I saw that interview with Shiva It's had a negative effect on me you Know I had a headache I was like sick Last night I mean like this kind of you Know just the energy that he exudes Whatever's going on there but before That as far as I was concerned

I had no relationship with big parasite Like nothing like I hadn't seen a video Of his in probably like two or three Years the only connection was that some Of the people called bear that were part Of his community Would comment on my YouTube videos and Most of them were just you know Commenting about my videos they didn't Talk about him Once in a while they would they would Say why don't you guys collaborate or You know I found out from Big parasite You know that about you like and that Was actually advertising for him because People would read that and say who was This guy and you know whatever it was But that was about it he talked about me Quite often and said things he reached Out to me a number of times that message Messages of support and it seemed like It was positive for me That part of it right that he was Talking about my channel you know I said A long time ago when I said he didn't Hate the guy because he said that I Hated him in some video and I you know I Said you know I didn't I responded when I don't hate him I don't hate him now When you have hate you form a connection Right when you hate someone you form a Connection with them when you're angry With them you feel any kind of negative Emotion towards someone you have a

Connection with them and I don't want a Connection with them and when I first um Watched his videos I had a negative Reaction and not that he wasn't funny or There wasn't you know I didn't see that He was smart or something like this like He has abilities he's not like you know I understand why he was able to make a Living as a comedian and you know these Things like he was able to connect with People he has better People skills in some ways than I do I Mean you know I don't know if that's True because of his I mean spirals right He has these emotional breakdowns and He's got these issues but in terms of His energy I just didn't like it like he People would send me clips of him Praising me like saying great things About me and you'd think that I'd enjoy That like you'd think that you know and I kind of don't anyway but uh even if It's somebody that's not you know Negative or parasitic but like just his Energy and just what he exude and I just Didn't like it I found it hard to watch Him right and so I didn't I didn't know That much about him I didn't you know I Didn't certainly want to talk with him And you know he reached out a variety of Times like I've said and wanted some More connection with me and I didn't Want that like I just you know I just Treated him like every other viewer you

Know there are people saying he was Stealing my material even now I'm Getting comments from people that used To be Bears or even our you know are Part of that community The parasite Community you know and I Just whatever like I just it was nothing To me like I just you know was something I barely ever thought about and you know People would you know again I just just From seeing people's uh names you know Their profile name with bear in it was The only contact I had for most of these Years Occasionally someone sent me a video I'd Watch it and you know I taped some of Them early on because I told you that I Thought at some point this was going to End with him turning on me because That's his Mo right but for the most Part like you know I felt like it was Nothing there nothing that was negative For me but today I felt like such a Relief And it was like breaking the connection It was you know after he wrote to me That he wasn't going to watch my videos I wasn't a trusted person he was going To leave me alone I felt like wow it's a relief that he's Not doing that and you know I mean I Like it was like really felt good like You know like a burden was lifted and it Was like I just got rid of a parasite it

Was just like a parasite had been cut For me you know there was a an old video Clip I found and I had to go back to the Message a Facebook message from 2019. Where this person wrote to me and said That big parasite had stolen my um story Right like candy bar story And I copied the clip and you know you I Saved it you know something I and I you Know lost and I had to find it and it Took a little time took like an hour and A half and a day where i'm you know Making an unpleasant video I didn't want To make And my response to her was parasite That's all I said like one word and That's what I'd been thinking this whole Time I was making the video this guy's a Parasite you know and even though there Was Barely any contact with us and most of What he said about me was positive There was some sort of energy drain that Was happening you know he was like Feeding off of me you know there's this Mo that he has as well that a number of People said in the comment section Section which I've known myself is he You know befriend somebody in the truth Community that has a popular Channel And he talks globally about the person They have a relationship and then they Have a blowout and Owen goes after the Guy's followers

Right he goes half twice to you know Snake a bunch of the dudes or you know The creators followers and these Dramatic things that he creates right he Creates this drama and all this you know Conflict and things and he just spirals Like he was just doing it with these Other guys doing with Oliver Anthony Even though Oliver Anthony wasn't Responding and he just you know vents His Venom and all these things at a Person you know when the parasitic Connection is cut And he's no longer able to suck energy Then he uses it to dry and you know like They have these rap beefs or whatever Like this is his you know psychological Makeup you know I don't care what he Says like he's already said these Horrible things about me I'll make References to some of them and these are Just things people told me in the Comments but I want to know about them Like I don't care Because you know this is Somebody who's parasitic and I'm happier Like the person's not in my life I would Rather have the person hate me and be Venting at me than be friends with me or Trying to be friends with me and you Know like a fan like I would rather have Him be whatever he is now than a fan Like that feels better It's a relief and that's you know why

He's a big parasite like it's not like I'm I'm not creating a false version of Him right like he just wrote a long rant To me Um like a long one and I didn't read you Know I just read the last section Because I don't want any contact you Know and it's like he's spiraling I you Know I went out and did things today and My wife and I came in for a walk and you Know there's just all this stuff he's Doing and you know I went to block him And he's posting stuff about me on Instagram and I'm like you know you know There's people who when anybody's saying Anything about them negative I mean most People are like this when people are Saying negative negative things about Them they are um you know they they want To know about and then they get all Triggered and they get all upset and you Know all these things maybe celebrities Do this a lot and you know who cares Like who cares what people say or or Believe about you I mean I've you know Learned that through being on the Internet now I don't really care And I only thought I cared when I was Younger like it doesn't matter because On some level like I know I'm a piece of [ __ ] like you know I know I'm not that Great right like if somebody's Commenting commenting about me and most Of the stuff's just made up like what

They're commenting about is not me so Let's say somebody says something about You that's based in truth and so you can Either change that thing or accept that That's what you are then if somebody's Lying about you like somebody's telling Lies about you they get into this whole Thing oh that's not fair and people are Going to think this about me it's not True and all these things and again what Difference does it make right You know what difference does it make Like if they like you or they don't like You they believe false things about you Or whatever it is like what difference Does it really make and for me in this Situation not having to watch him you Know the harder part for me is watching Him listening to his voice you know Seeing his mannerisms like all of it Like it's just it it makes me feel icky Like it's harder for me to watch him Than watch Trump or Biden or Alec Baldwin or pretty much anybody of course There's more of an interpersonal Connection but not really much of one I Miss how I felt all along And so knowing that there's no Connection there these at least he says He's not going to watch my videos Anymore you know I mean if that's to be Believed but either way you know the Connection has been severed this Happened years ago you know there's this

Thing called uh etheric cord cutting and You can look it up right I don't know You know if it's true or not but I did Have an experience with it And my ex was looking to cut the cord Between me and her like it was uh you Know it's uh you know the energetic Court And She talked about it and like there was This thing or whatever and you know we Were separated but you waited a long Time and it happened a day that she Didn't even tell me but I knew when it Happened like that's that's why I Believe it's a real thing and it was Like like I was so happy It was like such a relief I couldn't Believe what a relief it was it was like I there was like a parasite inside of me That was severed and my energy level Went up and you know even though I was Going through a tough time a tough Spiritual cleaning it was amazing and Like I felt the same way even though There was almost a non-existent Relationship like this is the burden This you know this guy is this parasite Right you know when I was making the Video I thought it was you know I mean I Think he was going to change so I'm like Why even make this video but it was for Him you know I just put out something Called the gift you know I thought it

Would be for him I thought it would be For his you know followers I don't know Somebody maybe people who had who had Had bad experiences with him but I Didn't think it was going to be Beneficial to me I knew that he would Get pissed I know some of his followers Would want to defend him right and I Knew that you know I wasn't going to Benefit my channel because I'd lose some Subscribers or whatever else like I Didn't think I would get benefit from it And so that's one of the reasons I Didn't want to do it right why would I Do something I don't get personal Benefit from you know and he's been a Big supporter of the channel but once I've done it it's like man do I feel Better and then when I saw he's just Ranting you know all this stuff and you Know he's just spiraling and paragraphs Of you know I'm like oh God I don't want To read this thing I don't want to connect with this person Right this you know I mean it's a Parasitic kind of relationship so I Responded to him because the last thing He wrote was that our relationship was Basically over which was great and then I came back and saw that he was Spiraling again and all of it you know He said that I don't like conflict you Know like whatever I said my video about Being

You know the apex predator of mocking Right and he's like I don't like Conflict but I can do this all day You're saying I don't like conflict and It's like a Veiled Threat you know Whatever right you know you know just Parasitic stuff And so this is my last response to him You're a parasite and you can lie about Me all you want people told me what you What what you said about me and my Family and you know and you know it's Not true but you were weak little butt Hurt parasite you're not a bear you're a Parasite He said it uh he said it should be you Said it yourself when you're talking About how I brought back the word ghoul When I call somebody name it's true like He was praising me about How I was calling people Ghouls and they Were clearly ghouls right and he started Using the word and other people did you Know it sort of made it around The truth community When I call someone a name a name it's True I don't need to make something up About someone I can read them and tell them what what They are and you're a parasite be clear About this it's not that I don't want Conflict I don't want drama I did not Know this at first before I made the Video but it's been a great but it's

Been great not having you as a fan you You yourself severs a connection when You said you are no longer going to Watch me and could not trust me and you Could and you would leave me alone so All connections have been cut between us So go find someone else to suck off Parasite When you are talking poop about me You're talking about yourself you're not Talking you are not talking about a Straw figure it should be you are Talking about strong figure that you Created because you're weak and you and When you I told you the truth about Yourself He created you created it should be a Version of I should have I should Approved for this You you created a version of me so you Don't have to face yourself So you can spiral and spit Your Parasitic Venom at imaginary version of Me but be clear you and I are not Connected what a joke it is that you Call yourself bear you're nothing like a Bear I didn't realize I said that twice You're a big parasite and that's how you Will be known henceforth So I'm not going to read the quote again Because I read it like 10 times in the In the other video but he said I was his Ghost to stream Right like just two days ago he's in a

Couple days ago he said this Um this is when he was first sort of Uh ranting about me you know I just Gotta find this again here oh here it is Um he said Um they're just mad because I promote You and they want you to destroy your Channel he's talking about these trolls That he thought were influencing me and Then he said your channel has taught me A lot and how to hate and how to not Hate the Demonic system and accept uh And accept I'm dependent on it This is some of the things I say right Which is something you know that would Be beneficial for people So I give you props because I don't Steal your material material if I if I Hear something good I give credit which Some of the time he did but other times He didn't and none of that it means Anything at this point but this is the Other part later on he said even if you Don't like me I legit don't care I just Think you're hilarious and shout you out Because I don't want your channel to die And he also was telling me how I could Save my channel and that other comedy Talked about how I could you know Monetize my fan base and put everything Behind a pay while he was giving me Ideas for me to you know make more money In these other things right and so he Wanted to save my channel and he's

Shouting out my channel and this is just Two days ago right and then I'm you know Then I made this video and again like I Can't say it enough like I don't feel Like it was me making the video like you Know my egos involved sure it always is Is it you know partly me sure But it was motivated by my Divine Connection right through the Divinity That comes through me because anybody Can connect to God I mean it's not hard You just have to want to do it most People don't want to connect to God Because People's egos don't want to submit to a Higher authority but when you're willing To do it God will work through you and Sometimes you like it and sometimes you Don't and it always has hidden benefits Which this is already having hidden Benefits right But anyways I made the video and then All of a sudden he's saying all these Horrible things about me like really Horrible things Now there's not me he's talking about It's him who he's talking about himself Right these are creation you know this Straw man that he's created that's Really a own version of himself and his Own self-hatred like this is how these People are these type of personalities And you know there's the parasitic Element of it so either he has horrible

Judgment like the things he's saying About me they're only because like They're not like he has you know proof Of the things or he's you know he ever Really thought those things about me Like he looked at the things I said and He's watched a tremendous amount of Content of mine he's watched me for you Know like all of my contact content like He said I was his go-to stream so he Watched all my content enjoyed the Content told people about me said how Great I was told me he wanted to save my Channel all these things right And then the only thing that changed was I said I believe he's toxic he's hateful And he's spewing negative energy which You know if you look at the comment Section of my video so many other people And these aren't trolls these are people Used to be a part of the parasite Community there right there's a people Who used to deal with this guy and know Him and you know maybe you know he was I Mean it's not like he has just one side Like he has a you know positive side People are having positive interactions With them right you have to be like Really have cult goggles on or brain Dead to not know this guy is toxic you Know like I mean how do you not know He's toxic like it's just there you the First time you hear him talk you can see He's a toxic person you know there's

Comedians like Louis CK is a another you Know not a severe example like of this Louis CK is much funnier like he's a Funny guy But there's things that Louis C.K says That just are gross and like turned your Stomach right like he's saying stuff Really funny and you're laughing and Then he takes it to a really depraved Level and lots of comedians do this you Know they get too vulgar or even if They're really funny there's um One of my favorite maybe my favorite Comedic special you know I like Brian Regan because you know Brian Regan is Cleaner and he doesn't have so much you Know gross energy like his comedy is you Know fairly clean Uh but like there's a guy named Chris um Porter Chris Porter and he had a recent Special on Netflix like in 2018 or 19. And it's hilarious and I'd seen this guy In that show Last Comic Standing you Know I always like comedians in their You know comedians are always broken and Twisted in some way but you know they're Interesting people And that reality show was my favorite Reality show and nobody watched it was Kind of weird but it was interesting and This guy Chris Porter was on it and then I you know he disappeared he was in a Special it's really funny my wife and I Listened to it

Um you know like earlier this year on a Trip and we got you know I don't know 30 Minutes into it I turned it off we Turned on some music and I felt gross And heavy and it was funny like he was Funny but it's you know dark and angry In these things his condition you know The the condition that's there the same Thing with Chris Rock's recent Um you know Netflix uh special like you Know I I enjoy stand-up comedy but Oftentimes after I listen to it it Negatively affects my spiritual Condition and with Scott when this guy Big parasite it's like the worst right Like I just can't do it like it was you Know it was hard for me to so like you Know listen to him or see him or just Any of these things so we're all made up Of energy right and so when you connect To people you connect with their energy If somebody walks in a room and they Feel fearful or or angry and you know Lots of people on YouTube I pick up Negative energy from them and it doesn't Mean that they're bad people it means You know they could be I mean broken or Twisted or you know they just having a Bad day I mean you know it's all these Things that's why I say you know when You go on the internet because it's such A toxic place you want to come from a Place where your Cobb and you're you Know not producing more negative energy

And degrading the place but this guy is Like the worst and you know he's just Ranting about me but he does this with Everybody like if you're his you know if He likes you you're the greatest person In the world you know and you're he Praises you and all these things and if He doesn't like you or you do something To upset him you hurt his feelings and He says horrible things about people Like horrible things but you say the Slightest thing about him he like goes Off and this is not you know I saw this When I was just looking at his Instagram Page and I saw this recent video where He was arguing with that stone guy and The stone guy seemed like some nice mild Manner Canadian guy And you know big parasites just being Like a total douche and angry and just You know hateful and he's always getting Sexual like he's like he gets sexual With men quite a bit talks a lot about Them sexually in some way trying to Degrade them in some weird way like he's Got lots of issues and you know I agreed With big for what I saw the argument What I understood about it it was about Jordan Peterson and maybe to some extent About um That uh you know the singer the rich man North of Richmond singer and you know I Don't think Jordan Peterson is like a Truth I don't know that much about him

And you know this guy commented on big Parasites page and they got into it and You know he was spiraling and going After the guy And then you know and then he realized That I'd gone South And he you know did this other thing and Now the on the object of his discontent But what anybody can see is the only Thing that's changed is that I said Things he didn't want to hear And I said them in a respectful way like I didn't name column I didn't you know Do anything provoking I didn't go after Him I didn't do any of those things Right You know um I said what we all know like even the People who are fans of big parasite There are people said they like him you Know they they're fans of his right and You know that they agree with all this They all know he's toxic they don't like The anger he's you know this is a part Of him they don't like right this is Something that many of the people get Tired of or they turn the part off or Fast forward it when he goes on these Rants and spirals Because they all know it like even his Fans know it right like everybody knows It but him like you'd have to be you Know like how would you not know the guy Says horrible things he says degraded

Demonic things you know when Alex Jones Goes on some sort of rant right And it goes south and it's like yeah This is gross this is you know it has Negative vibrations you know some of my Content has better vibrations than other Part right like some of it's more Divine And some of it's more me like there's People leaving comments saying you said This comes from God but do you have Britney videos you know oh wow you got Me like That's your level of trolling right of Course the Britney videos they're just Me mocking her which people enjoy For you know like celebrity content that People need to connect with Need to have to connect with my channel I said this over and over again there's Part of my channel That I have to do and I enjoy and I've Learned to enjoy but I didn't want to do It at all celebrity culture is beneath Me that's at least how I felt before you Know I was in India and my marriage was Crumbling and we're running out of money And you know there was the reason we Moved to India fell apart and I had Mostly talked about homesteading and my Spiritual life Mostly homesteading and then once in a While I made a like you know some kind Of Truth or Illuminati type video Whatever it was right once in like you

Know a month two months maybe there was Like maybe one a year I don't know very Infrequently And I had a couple of videos that popped I Had a video about Michelle Obama past Possibly being a dude that got two Million views it was my most watched Video and it wasn't that good like I Look back at it now and it was an okay Video but I would change a lot about it And it would get a lot less views right Like the worst videos got more views and You know as I matured and developed as a Truther but I'm there in India and I am Looking at how to make this channel Financially viable so I can you know Turn it into a job And make money off it by as well as You know getting the word out and the Specifically about the internalization Of God God being inside yourself like it Was like a a Divine mandate like I knew God wanted me to do this and you can say How do you know well like you know I Can't explain it to you it's not a I'm Not trying to convince you I'm just Telling you my story you know with all My stuff you either believe it or not I Don't expect you to believe everything I Say or agree with it I say this all the Time But anyways I looked at My videos

And I looked at the ones that were doing You know the most um in terms of views And money And they're all celebrity videos and They're all things that I didn't like to Cover And it was like God was ordering me to You know dive into the Beast So I could you know get the word out it Was like you know I don't want to call It being like a missionary but you know I was diving into this stuff I don't Care about celebrity culture I don't Care about politics you know I don't Mind talking about it but I cared less About it even then and I didn't know as Much about it because for years I hadn't Had a TV like I had TV on and off and I Never kept up with celebrity culture Like I didn't ever you know read People Magazine you know I did like I was a kid I was in a you know a doctor's office And I looked at People magazine I was Like oh this is interesting and I was Like oh my God this sucks right you know I watched the Entertainment Tonight like One time like you know for five minutes And I was like Wow celebrity culture Sucks that I'm not interested in it and Here I was talking about all the time so I had to learn about it like I didn't I Missed the whole Britney Spears era Because I didn't have a TV I didn't have Cable and I didn't listen to the radio

At that time so I you know I knew she Was she existed but I didn't know her Music I didn't you know know what she Was liking these things but people like Those videos people are attracted to Hollywood people are attracted to those Types of topics and if I just made Spiritual videos nobody would watch So I have you know it's a way I've Sacrificed I mean now it's not a Sacrifice I enjoy it like I've learned To enjoy because I have to do it but at First I didn't want to do it I was like You know I I'll make one a week like That was it was like the deal I made With God like you know I'll make one a Week and I was making a video like one Every it took me one and a half two days To make a video And it used to drain the crap out of me Like I'd be you know just I feel gross And I feel heavy spiritually I need to Like spiritual cleaning and things I Mean it was tough like I was you know in India I was by these ashrams I was in You know next to these ashrams that were Like a great spiritual condition and I Was meditating all the time and I you Know I should have felt great but the Videos the you know the Hollywood stuff It was just so heavy and gross and I got Used to it I you know learned to cope With it right you know you don't have to Believe that I am connected to God or

God is coming through me you can either Feel it you don't like I'm not expecting You to take my word for it I was just Saying this is where the place is coming From and I didn't know how good I was Going to feel like tonight how good I Feel now Like I had no idea like it was going to Be some hidden benefit for me because They always nothing there in terms of The relationship between me and big Parasite like I didn't you know I didn't Think anything of it like sometimes you Don't know until you do something and That was the result and now you know if I've experienced the you know the energy Was always there whether he's you know Praising me or he's your friend or you Know he likes you and you know he's You're getting whatever the the positive Side we see what he does when he feels Like he's been slighted and he turns on You and everybody who's has a Relationship that's how it's going to End You know that's how it's going to end With the guy because as soon as he goes South on you or you realize something About him and you say something to him Or you criticize them or you know the People in his you know his organization Right I mean a person like this can't Have a positive organization You know a person like this is incapable

Of having anything but a cult Because he can't be criticized he can't Have his leadership challenged he's you Know volatile and when he goes south he Just you know just spews like demonic Crap on people like he's opens his mouth And just demonic filth flies out of it You've seen it like you've all seen it I Mean everyone who watches his stream I Don't watch his streams I don't know how To get to his streams I said that I Don't even you know people have told me Where it is or what its name I don't Remember like you know I have no Interest in it right certainly not going To pay for it like I don't want to watch It anyway and I've seen him do it like I Know he does this you know not just with Me now but he's done this for years and Everyone says he does this for years and It makes people uncomfortable it comes From a dark place and I pointed this out To him something that all of his fans Know I'm sure everyone in his life knows About this I'm sure you know nobody Likes it I'm sure no one's psyched about This quality of his you know there's People like you know some of them like The drama some of them like the conflict So some of them like you know watching Some people go out at the internet and They get their popcorn out because They're you know parasites in their own Right

But you know in terms of You know his uh I mean being around that Kind of energy nobody likes it nobody Likes being around that kind of energy No one likes being around someone you Have to walk on eggshells a volatile Personality right no one likes that come On you guys know everybody but him or People who are just like brain dread you Know cult goggle people Know that everything I said in the video At least is based in truth in some way Or another And that if he could hear it and change It and realize that it's negative for Him and everyone around him and he'd be A better person if you make the world a Better place if he wasn't so toxic and If you could figure out a way to to get Rid of it you know and I offer a Solution And there's a gracefulness meditation Which he knows about like he never even Tried it like maybe it would work maybe It wouldn't probably wouldn't for this Case I don't know maybe it would depends On how sincere he was but I'm not like Saying there's there I don't know a way To get rid of toxic energy because I've Had toxic energy myself right You know I had you know I wasn't as bad As he was but I had a lot more Negativity and you know a lot more anger And hatred in my system and resentment

And things that you know got cleaned out From years of doing spiritual work And so like I can say that it works and You know I mean it it's there's always Hope if you're willing to change but This is anyways the you know I hope this Is the last time I talk about this you Know maybe I might mention it here or There you know videos or whatever if There's some kind of update to you know There's not going to be update in terms Of Me hearing about what he's saying about Me or any kind of thing that's happening It's just going to be me realizing stuff About this later on like things I don't Know now that I might realize later That's the only you know part of this I'm going to talk about you know and Encourage people to To adopt the big parasite as a because Big parasite is an accurate description Okay I finished the video again and I Realized I tell stories about the Similarities to some of the things I've Gone through with my ex and You know heartfulness and you know like To a lesser extent this thing those Things were more prominent in my life so I drew a blank like I had this idea that I felt like I needed to put in because I left it out of the narrative you're About to listen to And I drew a blank about what that was

But I think I've retraced it after Eating breakfast and going outside for a Little bit and committing to just moving On and not adding it you know I wanted To add everything so I didn't have to Make any more about this right I've Given this Enough attention right and it's Um you know my policy about this It's always the same you know with my ex I Disconnected with her on social media And you know my kids will occasionally Talk about her and I didn't you know Mostly it was in a joking way or they Would tell me something that's going on In their life or whatever But it was very infrequent and so I was Like she doesn't really she's like dead To me right and The stuff with heartfulness um You know I asked people to stop sending Me things I stopped watching any videos on Darfield's YouTube channel because it Just made me feel It would just bummed me out like it was Just a you know I didn't need more Information about how bad dodgy screwed The thing up For those of you who've watched my Videos about these things You know it's just a disconnect from it Because

It is negative right every time I come In contact with it it has a negative Effect on my spiritual condition But what I was going to say here is you Know when you do a parasite cleanse There is some issues with it like you're Killing something in your body and the Parasites turned into toxins within you Have to find a way to detox your body And get them out of your body and You know the parasite is you know not Going to leave uh you know it's host Willingly and it's always gonna I mean Something's a cancer even you know when You get a tumor removed to the cancer Removed and you know wherever you have To go through To get rid of it Um It's always a painful process you know When I went to Seismarck Gatherings meditation Gatherings Usually I get sick ahead of time I'd be Moody emotions negative emotions would Come up And like I'd be uncomfortable and you Know this the travel was always maybe Difficult there would be some issues Some you know frustration with the Travel there's always something Like there was always something that Would begin the cleaning process And it was removing toxicity spiritual

Toxicity from my system And you know it sucked it was unpleasant Like you have to go through something Unpleasant you know telling people what They don't want to hear or saying things That they Are you know putting up Um you know they're making sure that That you if you say these things they're Going to try to take it out on you you Know they're doing things too Uh create a situation where You know they're going to let you know If you break up with them or you say Something you know you criticize them or You know whatever it is that they're Going to lash out and get you you know There's going to be some uh like they're Gonna do something negative to you it's A way to Manipulate and control your behavior And so you know going through these Unpleasant things in the beginning Is what it takes to yield Uh you know a positive outcome Afterwards Like you have to you know take your Medicine and then you know after you Know the medicine's not pleasant it Tastes bad whatever but after you're Done with it it's much better you know Divorce is tough Um Master charity said that there's a Spiritual punishment of of one year

Mandatory like one year punishment That everybody kind of receives for Breaking an agreement a marital Agreement even if you're The good person in the marriage and the Other person wrecked the marriage and You know you're doing the right thing He still suffer divorce is tough And there's all these things that you Have that are intertwined you know There's complexities And you know there's joint property and Things like that stuff and whatever and Then of course kids and you know all of It and like so there's a separation Of these you know of uh you know two People sharing a life And you got to separate all these things Out of it and a lot of it is painful and You know things that you're like I don't Want to do that right like you realize Ahead of time that you're going to pay a Price for something and again it's much Less with this situation with the big Parasite because you know I don't really Have a knowing relationship with him Like he's watches my videos and you know Does whatever he does you know Plagiarizes me I mean that's uh but for me like the Only thing is that there's some you know Joint uh watching the videos and once in A while he would reach out to connect With me but I knew there would be a

Reaction from him and maybe some of his Fans like there was that aspect of it Not nearly as bad you know the thing With Breaking off from heartfulness it cost Me my relationship with my brother To whatever extent like and even if we Are in contact in the future you know Just Um and then you know I said things I said things that I felt like I it was Cathartic for me to say them but I'm Sure it's not great for my brother to Hear or whatever You know but there was other Consequences for all these things but in The end it's what has to be done like Sometimes you have to do something And initially it's going to be painful But it's going to yield good results in The end sometimes you know you just know What you have to do God tells you or you Know you just know in some different way I mean if you're not thinking about God Consciously but it's you know your soul Is like you got to do this thing and you Don't you don't want to do it but you do It You know and it comes at a price and you Have to be willing to pay the price and The prices ultimately worth it it's a Bargain you know but you pay up front Right and it's it gets better after that You know the you know the um

The benefits of the price you paid far Exceed the cost of what you did but you Know the initial hit is what happens at The beginning and then the the benefits Sort of unfold but anyways I just want To add this one little part and I'll Have this last um voiceover and you know I just want to move on from the subject And I don't see why I would need to talk About it anymore okay so I just Completed the introduction to this video And I um I'm eager to move on to my regular Videos go back to making regular videos Because it was you know not a pleasant Experience connecting with this person And I don't know of his community or Whatever it wasn't I don't know there Was mild reaction In the comment section But I want to say a few things about This last night um You know when you wrote me these there Was a Rants and I you know came in and I Found out you've written a bunch of Stuff on Instagram and I I don't like Reading this stuff anyway people said me I mean especially if it's lengthy and You know sometimes people are having a Heartfelt reaction Um well let me just start off with this You know praise is not necessarily a Good thing

Flattery is not necessarily a good thing It's only a really good way it comes From somebody's heart when somebody's it Has a heartfelt reaction to you And it's like a gush of that positive Reaction That you've done something and gratitude Pours out and you know Uh you know just positive energy like They're you know there's a when Someone's grateful for you or you know Just uh whatever it might be but praise And flattery that you might get from Somebody You know every narcissist every um Womanizer every soul-sucking like woman You know like every uh bad person in a Relationship that you might have men Have experienced this with certain type Of women women experience this with Abusive men or womenizing men They're usually very complementary and You know nice to you at the beginning Like most people are because that's how A relationship starts out and so they Might even be sincere in their flattery They might be sincere in what they see In young complementary and you know and Sometimes when you're feeling bad about Yourself or You know so it's a good thing it's Positive energy And everybody's tearing each other down So much on the internet and you know the

Way things are now In relationships like sometimes it's you Know it's like anything else it can be Good it can be bad But the way that flattery and Compliments are bad Is if you start thinking you're better Than people right if you start you know When you become a celebrity and Everyone's telling you how great you are And you start feeling that way Then it's a negative right I've talked About this in the scishmark system And Zealand is something that is praised As things necessary for a saint And those things are Uh slightly poor health Which means that you have to become Moderate because you know when you're Young and strong you you might engage With you know bad behaviors because your Body can take it you can drink alcohol You can use drugs you can You know take chances because you feel Indestructible And when you're you know you have a Little bit of poor health You're moderate in what you do it Creates moderation right where you're Not um As you don't take as many chances and Risks and things like this Um the other thing is slightly less Money than you need like poverty is a

Bad Thing poverty itself can be Something that become all-consuming You just um focus in on your poverty Because you don't have enough of you Know people who are in Desperate poverty Can't do anything else that's all they Can Uh it's like somebody who has insomnia They can't even deal with any of the Other problems because they can't you Know the first problem is that you deal With is getting a good night's sleep Well as in graduate school I had a teacher a professor that said Let's say a client comes into you you Know you're into your you know whatever Your practice or whatever it is and they Have these symptoms and one of them was Insomnia they said what what symptom do You treat first and everyone had Different opinions he said insomnia Because you know until you treat the Insomnia The person's not going to have the Energy and strength to do anything else Right but having slightly less than you Need also creates moderation it creates Uh frugality it creates a gratefulness For what you have you know is all these Things And so people with lots and lots of Money become people with lots and lots Of money you know have become oblivious To lots of life's problems and so you

Know slightly less than you need And the other thing is critics Because critics keep you humble critics Also help you clean out things critics Make you you know question yourself And especially somebody who's becoming More and more spiritual and people are Gravitating to them having these three Things helps to you know keep them from Getting a big head and all of it right You know all the things that go with Fame and you know fortunate celebrity And you know especially if you're a Spiritual person And people you know pour all over you And and these things And for me you know I Get lots of people who praise me and say That I've changed their life in some way You know that what I'm doing here is Help them Shaving the sky you know the big Parasite I mean he's I read you some of The comments I shared some of the clips That he's you know had a you know Positive experience where Information on my channel helped And I sometimes attribute some of it to me Certainly I'm doing the work and I'm Being a conduit so I'm part of it but You know the deeper feelings that people Have in the the deeper experiences they Have on my channel where things

You know our uh transformational for Them I recognize it's God working through me You know that you know I'm aware that by Myself I'm fairly incompetent Um you know underachieving and like Before before I started doing sash Mark And connecting to God internally Before I had that relationship You know when I talk about it here Infrequently because when I use the word God you know but when I when I bring God Into My work incorporating God into what I do As a you know as a as an output as quick Content here which is is always there It's constant and when I say that you Know because religious people say God This God that you know But it's just a word or a mental idea And this is a process so I don't talk About it so much because I can't do justice of the process I talk About enough so people know That it's there like I don't say it Every video or every you know but it's There That I wake up and there is you know uh A communion with the Divinity within me And that is coming through and I'm Acting as a conduit to some extent you Know part of these videos is me because You know people are criticizing me some Of these you know parasite people were

Criticizing me And saying that how can you say you this Is you're doing God's work when you're Covering Brittany or whatever it is like I talked about that in the earlier Voiceover and you know it's a Combination right there's a combination Of you know some of the you know Snarkiness and the other things are you Know me there and the other you know More higher stuff is Uh you know reflection of my soul and The Divinity within me right there's the Ego and the soul and they go together And most people ignore the soul Don't even know they really have one They might you know if you ask them they Say you have a soul but they're not In contact with the soul right and They're not cultivating that Relationship and so you know the Difference between somebody who does And put in the effort is substantial Even if it's you know small efforts and Some of the effort is just Saying to God you know I'm willing to Serve And then you know figuring out what that Means and letting God guide you and show You the service but because I meditate I Kind of have a sense of what I am you Know so Um when people tell me I'm greater than I know I am I don't take it seriously

You know for them yeah sure that's their Experience And I've done something for them or They've had some sort of you know Movement so they feel good about me But I know that's you know I'm not great Like you know I know it like I you know That's why I'm not I mean I understand my flaws I don't focus on Them I'm not someone who's like you know Self-flagellating beating myself up About it because you can't function if You do that but I'm aware of them and I'm aware that I'm working on some or I've you know gotten better at stuff and You know other things are still there as Good older you should be maturing and Evolving then there are critics and People that say things that you know are Not true right that are you know Fundamentally uh you know wrong and They're just trying to dump their toxic Energy there are a lot of people that go On the internet and they have stuff Inside of them That's icky that's toxic that's you know Poison Venom and they just want to dump That on other people And there are other people who want to Watch that because they feel the same Thing and it's a release for them Without having to get involved Personally you know they there's people Who are saying they wanted to see

You know a feud between me and the big Parasite like they were digging it right It was entertaining to them so the People who were actively fed by the Negative energy or dumping negative Energy Are you know worthless and should be Avoided right like if you don't Understand that and you understand that By the way that they make you feel Even if it seems like it's going to make Your situation worse and this thing with The big parasite like I've been through It before right and I was going to go Back and read some of the things you Wrote so I could talk about them here Because I you know just glanced at it And he was you know I believe Threatening to you're saying something The fact that you know you're sending All his people here to troll me which You know has had Zero Effect like They're barely there it's like nothing That I you know looking at the video was A small percentage of the comments the Things they were saying were stupid they Were you know people that don't know me Like one person said I didn't watch the Video but I'm gonna side with the big Parasite like you know just like comment I just saw this morning Well you know like so you're already Prejudiced against it why are you Commenting and why are you here why even

Watch the video then if you already Think that this is you know Um like But he also said stuff about me not Wanting conflict and he said he can do This all day You know thinking that I'm watching them Like I'm not like the biggest thing in In this for me whether he was praising Me or whether he's making stuff up and Slandering me and saying you know Horrible things about me or criticizing Me Is that I don't have to watch him either Way like the thing that I most don't Want to do is watch him and you know There are people who when they hear They're being criticized immediately Would go and watch the video And why would I do that like why would I You know it's like reading the negative Comments I don't do it like I don't read The negative comments that people are I Mean sometimes I'll make a comment video But oftentimes I just don't have the Time for it as soon as I see the Person's being negative I ban them and you know because I don't Want to waste my time again right and Then I just move on ignore them and move On right because you know people wallow In The criticism that people give and some People are so narcissistic they're like

Oh someone's saying negative negative Things about me And then they you know get triggered and Whatever and then they get sucked into The whole thing and you know They attach themselves to the person Again to some weird feud-like dynamic And that's what I was talking about Drama like I'm not no conflict is Conflict that's one thing drama is Something else like conflict that has to Be done is conflict that has to be done Right but drama is something else And you know if a homeless person like Crazy homeless person was sitting Outside like the supermarket and they Just started spewing things about you And saying things you know a person Doesn't know you at all would you walk Up to him say sir I believe you're mistaken about my Character you know Like you're going to try to tell the Person they're not true right like you Would just want to get away from that Person You know some random person who knows Nothing about you and is just trying to You know lash out and hurt you because They're crazy and homeless and all these Things and you know you can't help them I mean they're too far gone and you Don't want to you know it's just yeah You want to you know make sure you don't

Have a relationship with them they're They're letting you know That they're unstable right you know so Him saying all these things like Threatening me like is some kind of he's Going to keep on slandering me and Talking about me and obsessing them with Me like the best thing that's happened For me is that the relationship whatever It was Is gone like I woke up feeling relieved And I felt great yesterday you know he Had this idea that you know I wanted to Hear what he had to say and I never have I never liked listening to him you know He's listened to hours and hours of my Content you know thousands upon Thousands of hours you know hundreds of Hours I don't know how much is I mean Journey series itself he's been Listening to me for you know it's part Of his daily routine you know he's Um taken things you know he listens to Me So um let me just read this comment here There's a number of comments like this This person wrote Okay I'm glad this came up to the video Of You know message for uh the parasited And the other parasites I found Pockets After watching parasite in 2020 I watch pockets and the big parasite Pretty much every day in 2020. the

Amount of ideas and talking points the Parasite took from caucus without Recognition was outrageous The parasite would sometimes reference Pockets But it was not nearly enough And so you know this is a part of the Guy's life right like listening to me Which you know I'm glad I hope he isn't Like I hope he's moved on Um you know because it's not been great For me and you know people will I mean people still watch both of us and I don't know how you know people could But that's you know I mean as far as I'm Concerned he's like dead to me like he Just doesn't exist he's out there Whatever you know the same thing that I Did with my ex and you know he was Saying something you know again I only Got a gist of it and he had said this Earlier that me making this video was Gonna destroy my channel and the rest of It right and other people commented About that you can read the comments Because it's Interesting a lot of these people who Are still a part of that organization Agree with me And are saying this one person here Said this Uh well done Thank you Paul I believe you have helped Him which I didn't

Um I love you both I will hand I'll hand write I am I will Be handwriting a letter to him today This was very productive thank you thank You thank you so these are you know Comments like that lots of them where People recognize what I said was true And it obviously is because I said you Know you're toxic and you're you know Full of hate and he said no I'm not and Then just made up of my stuff about me And dumped hate on you know this um this You know it's a caricature like people Create a caricature review And it's based in the Distortion of the Artist the person looks at you And you know this their distorted view Of you And if you you know there's a one of Picasso's wives or ex-wives Committed suicide because He was painting her and then the Paintings got uglier and uglier and more Twisted because he was insane you know He's a severe abuse uh Survivor you know Victim and you know his art is Twisted Because of that right But this um situation is very similar to What I went through with my ex like you Know the big parasite reminds me of my Ex in the the way that he deals with Relationships and conflict and and Criticism and the rest of it right

Um and you know the victim Consciousness Like he's feeling like a victim like I Somehow victimized him like I wronged Him like he's done so much for me and You know I'm you know like whatever like That's coming through in some of the Comments of his followers like how dare You treat him like this he's been so Great to you you know like but in the Situation I was in we had built the Family around my ex you know the idea of The mother being the center of the Family The wife and mother which is you know The way it should be but if you have a Bad mother and wife then you know it's a Disaster right it's like it's important That the woman who's put you know a lot Of pressure on her to kind of hold this This family together and You know be the you know the center of The family Is you know it's pressure and it has to Be somebody of you know With a loving heart and equality you Know can't be but somebody's crazy and Broken Which so many women are that's why There's all these dysfunctional families Right you know um my ex wanted to leave Uh the family where in India and you Know one of her goals was to live in India and Be around an ashram and then she was

You know decide just to go off her Thyroid medication which was I mean a Disaster on every level You know I used to have to monitor her And if you show signs of having this you Know low T1 t two whatever T3 T1 or two T3 or both that was in the thyroid Medication if the levels were low she Would get really emotional and really You know I mean Her speech would slur and there was a You know possible potential crisis it Took a long time for the you know to get A higher dose this whole thing with Thyroids right people who don't have Working thyroids and she thought she Could reboot hers by going out for Medication which was You know a disaster for her and Um and she was flipping out and just Like was going to um Try this thing and Was basically leaving the family to do This and of course she failed went back On her medication after having You know physical repercussions But she was abandoning in our family When we were in a Visa crisis Uh you know my daughter was self-abusing And was you know sometimes Threatening suicide it was just you know A nightmare yeah she was just you know I Mean just everything about what she was Producing as a person

Like was a constant worry for me right And you know and all these things and Two of the kids and we were Homeschooling the kids and my ex was was Totally in charge of that and was just Abandoning that with two of the kids Being dreadfully behind I mean they were you know I mean all of It and like this was the vision she had For the family she was just quitting on All of it in the middle of like a crisis And we were in India and I was getting This YouTube channel was Just taking off and being There to help support the family when we Are in a financial you know dire Situation and all these things And so you know her leaving It felt like wow that's going to make Things that much worse because I'm gonna Have to deal with all this stuff on my Own You know four kids you know two of them Behind you know one of them having Health issues another one having severe Emotional issues all of them you know Stressing from Being in a dysfunctional family and you Know everything was falling apart And I didn't want her to leave but once She did it was like the best thing You know even though I was left with all This mess Being disconnected from her like I you

Know it took me a couple of days but it Was immediate relief And it was like such a blessing and as You know we worked out the the details Of our separation divorce she was just Kind of gone and when she would show off She would disappear for like a month Uh you know she was in America we were In India and she would disappear for a Month or so and come back and she Wouldn't contact the kids right and I Was you know I didn't want really any Contact with her because anytime she Showed up it got worse she wasn't all Helpful she just made things worse and You know while victim Consciousness and Creating drama and you know Destabilizing the kids and all the rest Of it and she was going through all These Health crises because she you know I mean her having the these uh enzymes That the thyroid produces T1 and T3 Are in Central like without them you Can't really be alive and so she was Falling apart physically and the thing Wasn't working that she was trying And she was then having psychological Breakdowns and whatever And I realized the relationship had been Parasitic that you know and I talked About the cutting of the cord I think of The voice over Yesterday I mean at some point I talked

About so it must have been yesterday And you know once that happened but even Before that I saw a huge boost to my Energy even though I was going through a Tough time cleaning and stressed out and I was worried about my daughter and you Know my kids and all these things But even with all that it was a net gain Like I was feeling better And I didn't want her back in my life or The kid's life you know I just saw how Negative and parasitic she was in the Victim Consciousness you know something That I associate with the big parasite You know people who When somebody says something they don't Want to hear And you know also what they both did in Common Uh and well someone says something they Don't want to hear and they just go Ballistic right in a way that's you know Not rational But something else they had in common Was they would provoke somebody to say Something negative and create conflict And then just spaz out Like freak out and just go you know Ballistic and you know just go into this Delusion and put all kinds of things on You that are true and say to all kinds Of things about you that aren't true you Know they're very similar personalities And it's a controlling mechanism that

People like this would they do this they Do this to control other people They say all right if you're going to Tell me the truth I'm this is what I'm Going to do to you And so people won't tell them the truth People know that the person can't handle It and so they walk around on eggshells And never confront the person because They know the person Will just you know go ballistic and so You know we were just I was dealing with The kids and getting the YouTube channel Going and doing you know my spiritual Stuff meditating three times a day you Know with the at the ashram and doing Things like this too You know I was going through this Cleaning phrase that I've talked about Extensively in my other videos And I was just pushing back dealing with This You know which was an end to a Dysfunctional marriage and relationship I'll deal with that at some later date And I knew I couldn't just say all right You know I so much better without you Uh it's over like I had to give her the Opportunity To change which I knew she wouldn't but It had to be there like it had to be you Know there had to be a conversation About that that and you know she was no Way gonna agree with my reality so it

Didn't you know but I had to say it at Least that was going to be like how it Would go you know is there any chance That you're willing to confront these Things and change and you know be a Healthy person in the relationship and Work towards that you know and with the Kids and all of it And you know I knew the answer would be No but I had to say it And then one day my daughter we went out To the movies and said my ex was Paralyzed she was suffering paralysis From the you know going to offer thyroid Medication she was having all these Health breakdowns and I freaked out like It just was like somebody gut punched me Because I was worried I was going to Affect the kids and you know all of it Like is you know and we hadn't talked in Like a month and a half like too much There's just no contact at all Um so I wrote to her and she didn't Write back And then I wanted to check to see if she Was alive on Facebook because she was Posting a lot on Facebook And I saw there was a message from her Daughter's boyfriend saying that he had Sent her a video for her and some guy's Name to watch and I knew that Sky steam Was their new boyfriend right which you Know because I had opened backed up and I was worried about her like was a

Little bit more painful than it would Have been But it turned out to be a blessing and a Relief like you know almost immediately Because now You know the relationship was over like I knew she was with this other guy and All these things and so another Similarity with this thing with the big Parasite is You know that um immediately upon Us you know acknowledging that the Marriage was over and she had been doing This the whole time but it was you know More flagrant then She started just slander me and blame me For everything In the organization that we're in and You know the organization meant Something you know the size Mark Organization which now is called Heartfulness and she was you know Talking bad to the you know future Master of the system about it dodgy and All these things about me and you know And it bothered me to some extent like I Knew every time I showed up at a Gathering people were looking at me and You know talking about me and you know Like there was like I was this bad evil Person and that didn't bother me at all Like I realized I didn't really even Though some of these people were gems And Saints and you know people that have

Had been great for me and those people Weren't necessarily uh you know judgment I don't know not all of them but just This Vibe you know and I was looked at As one of these problem people And it was uncomfortable and you know I I don't like to go with places that People don't want me and things like This but even with all that it was so Much better right like I can't even tell You how much better it was not to have My ex in my life and you know in these People I was just like I don't care About these people they don't deal who I Don't care what they think about me Because you know I know what I am like To whatever extent like you know I mean We all have you know Darkness inside of Us ego stuff we don't know how low our Ego will sink and we don't know the Nature of our soul like you know that's A mystery we don't know our true pure Essence and most people are scared of Their purity even more than they're Scared of the you know they're they're Scared of the Saint the potential Saint Inside of them even more than they're Scared of the potential demon inside of Them right Uh but you know like I I kind of Understand what kind of person I am and I'm not you know I see my own selfish Thoughts or negative thoughts and I see The the generosity and the good things I

Have inside the good character qualities And you know I'm not uh I don't lie to Myself I don't have to you know pretend I'm better than I am or or be myself or Make myself worse than I am or be you Know these things like people who are Constantly saying oh I suck or all these Things you know I just am what I am and I'm working to be better right and what Other people think doesn't really matter So that you know similar situation where There was a you know a break in the Relationship and this was much more Substantial because I cared about those People and I you know I don't care about The big parasites followers right I just Don't care right if the guy's gonna say Negative things about me that's just What's happening but it wasn't better When he's saying positive things about Me It was just that he was connected to me Which is you know he's got negative Toxic energy and and having that Connection was negative to me even Though I was not even really aware of The relationship But then I got back to America And there was a woman who you know we Met on the you know to my YouTube Channel that was helping me and my Family get settled we moved to where she Was you know this idea we even have a Relationship

And she showed early signs of having Some tendencies Like my ex had And you know there were some good things About her good qualities and you know I Was all alone and I was dealing with Again this crisis you know I came back With five thousand dollars and you know Kids who needed a you know a Homeschooling plan and I had to you know I'm not an educator like I'm not that's Not something I'm really suited for it How was I going to deal with that and if I put the kids in school you know I Wasn't even sure I was going to live at The place that we returned to you know There's all these complex problems my Daughter you know being uh you know at Risk kid it was she was cutting and you Know talking about these things right You know that I mean just being negative All the time and every time we did Something you always had to think about Her like you know someone a high Maintenance person right I was talking About the big parasite being one of Those high maintenance persons that you Always gotta you know like there just Are always ready to snap and attack Somebody and you know do whatever so This woman came to a gathering with us And it was tense because My daughter wanted and I wanted to Return to India she had all these

Friends there And she wanted to ask dodgy if she could Do it and you know which was one of the Things I said she was 18 so she could Have and we should get the the money and The things herself which you know she Really didn't have the ability And she'd have to come up with a plan it Has I mean it wasn't you know it wasn't Doable right Uh it wasn't something that was you know Best for her But you know that was part of the thing Go talk to him about it right Um and she didn't get a chance to talk To him and she kind of flipped out and Cut herself and she got into it with my Son it was the whole thing it was all This drama and there's people there who Are you know gossiping about me I told The story extensively on my journey Series and things And this woman was she felt the energy Like she felt dodgy's energy back when He was you know before he fell he had a Spiritual fall and like she felt him Walk into the room he still had you know That masterly presence back then Um and she enjoyed the Gathering you Know and I paid for it and you know I I You know it was like a thing where I Helped her do this I was pretty sure our Relationship wasn't going to work out Because I

There was you know like she was she had Issues that I didn't think I could deal With that were some of them were similar To my ex in some ways right and as our Relationship progressed You know I could see there are problems And of course my kids were you know I Mean a handful and they were yeah and we Were in crisis right a family that was Not doing great and she had a son in That relationship was really Dysfunctional and she was less aware of Her situation with him and in denial About it and you know I knew I couldn't Bring my kids into that and just it Would be worse and so I had to like kind Of talk to her about it and I knew it Wasn't going to go well because she Already showed signs of Being one of these people who couldn't You know handle uh you know difficult Truths And I brought her to a park and I said Things you're very similar to what I Just did in the video here For the big parasite you know and I said Look this is the situation this is you Know And she just lashed out you know and Said what about your kids and you know Just all these things and and then she You know like maybe the next day wrote Me like a I guess it was a Facebook you Know message to me and there was three

Things and she was just saying things That weren't true but one of them was Did I try to indoctrinate her and like Make her do my spiritual practice like She did a whole long thing in this whole Paragraph Which you know she had a good experience There And I put out the extra effort because It wasn't so great to bring her with Salary all this drama that was there They had to deal with and my kids you Know and uh I mean she I guess she was Somewhat helpful like nice to have an Extra adult you know some extent but You know it's more of a you know just More of me having to give more of myself Right And I was like you know that was Completely not true right like you know I wasn't trying to force this thing on Her in fact I kind of knew that we were Probably not going to To make it but I thought she would be Someone that could do it because she was Sensitive to the energy and she was you Know when we went to the Gathering and You know and so it was very similar Though where she was just making things Up Because she wanted to hurt me or say Things that were you know just imagining Things that weren't true like people who Get into a fight with you and you had

They have legitimate complaints about You right because I'm far from perfect There's legitimate criticism to me there Are things that you know that I do and You know that are like I could see where Someone would be bummed out by it like There's times when my wife's like you Know could you make a little bit more Effort here or a little whatever And I'm like yeah you know like I Totally see why she would say that right Uh you know because those things are True they're things that you need to Improve and things that you know might Bother your significant other and then There are things that come out in a Fight like things that you think Negatively about somebody you don't say Them and then you have a fight or the Person attacks you and you say oh yeah Well this is what I've been feeling About you all along right these are Things I'm criticizing you about Because now that you've broken the peace Like one person breaks the piece And the other piece of person goes in And those things are you know Again it's just a way of people Uh saying things that they're repressing And you know that could be positive or Negative And if there are two things and you have To you know consider changing them then It could be a good thing right

You're just clearing the air But sometimes it's just better to focus On being grateful for what the good Things in person does And you know that's the way I kind of Have learned to see all these things Unless something really needs to be Addressed I don't say it like it's just Um you know I'm grateful for the I look For I look at the positive And focus on that and it's how you know It's what's best for me too Because once you start thinking about The negatives and complaining next thing You know you're you know you're calling Lawyers right it's just you know But then there's the third thing where The person Gets mad at you because you told them Some truth that they know about Themselves but they can't handle and so Then they just start thinking some ways To hurt you things that they you they Think that will hurt you and things that You know they know about you and they're Going to use against you and you know It's things that they feel like will do The most damage and this is what the big Parasites doing right to me now that Like I'm completely unaware of because I Don't want to listen to him right but He's you know lashing out in these Things very similar so I saw this woman Like a year later

We saw each other at the park and and Then we had an exchange on uh you know Whatever we message back and forth and We were talking about you know the way Things kind of ended and I you know I Said um You know this thing about you saying That I tried to force you indoctrinated You into my Spiritual practice and she said oh yeah Well I was just saying that to you know Hurt you you know I'm still doing it and I'm like what she goes yeah it's a Wonderful practice you know so I had Given her this gift and you know and she Used it you know this kind of thing very Similar And I just you know I'm not going to Have people like that in my life it's Just I can't do it after what I went Through with my ex and these other Things And then the thing happened with dodgy You know the current master and you know The president of the the seismarck was What he's now calling heartfulness System And you know I saw that he was doing Things you know he's writing these scams And doing all this stuff and I started Talking about publicly and he ended up Watching the videos and you know now People are really hating me like they Hated me before they were saying

Negative things about me before but now I was you know this bad person you know I cared about these people's opinions And you know I needed the system I need The meditation and the you know as a Part of my you know what helps me be a Better person and brings out the best of Me and helps me connect to God But something else replaced it which has Been far less stressful and you know um Doing it with other people here some of Them were doing heartfulness and they You know left it you know it's not an Organization but uh you know there's Some videos and things I've made and Sittings and whatever which I you know Which are working the stuff that I was Getting from the organization I'm now getting from you know connecting Directly to God which is you know the Organization was some ways great and you Know these people many of whom are I was Like friendly with and you know they Were part of my group right they were a Part of an organization that meant so Much to me and having everybody think Negatively about me and you know Whatever Through the divorce and then through This other stuff and so in each of these Circumstances with my ex and this woman I was seeing and then the organization It seemed like my life would be worse Without them right you know dealing with

Stuff on my own My kids and this you know problems that We had and you know then not having the Organization to uh to support me you Know there's lots of good Services the Organization Was was doing for me and other people Uh so you know they were helpful things Having you know more than one adult and All these things having a support system So on paper it looked like I was losing Something and it was going to be harder And you know for how stressed out I was And how you know overwhelmed I was It seemed like it was going to be you Know something that would almost Push me over the edge but you know I did What God wanted me to do you know what I Was led to do internally and things got Better And so even though it looked like it Would get worse it didn't You know this is the same situation with You know the big parasite you know my Channel is I'm struggling a little bit with YouTube And you know the same thing was Happening with my ex during the time I You know returned to America and then This you know when I was in this Relationship with this woman and they Had the ad apocalypse and I'm making Less money for the same amount of views And you know YouTube is more targeting

You know I mean channels in general not Just truther channels they seem to be Creating an oppositional relationship With the channels that are on them They're maybe moving in another Direction and there isn't really a Better platform for me and you know all These things and so somebody who's got His own following who's supported the Channel it seems like it's Counterproductive But you know I just feel better and I Know it'll be fine right because this is What God has wanted me to do and you Know when you get rid of negative energy Parasitic energy and you you know get Rid of like things that are draining you And they're always you know it's always Going to be better you know I can feel The relief and having somebody out there Who's you know actively you know Malevolent to me right and saying things Either publicly or whatever And just stewing in his own you know Vile and you know hate and whatever and Projecting on me but the fact that we're Disconnected you know it's I mean it's Better than having to be like that and Have him be a fan and be connected right Like you know I was connected in ways That I didn't even know because the Relationship was so insignificant to me You know just all the people that I Don't know here that watch my channel

That you know I I mean you don't know Somebody and they're there and they're Having an experience of me because They're watching hours and hours of me Talking about my life and saying these Things and I know almost nothing about Them and you know I don't know you know I don't know them as a person like I you Know some know some people better Through their comments and things but It's a very light relationship at best But in this case there was just Negativity there and you know there was Some paracetic element like one of my Viewers said that he was selling merch With the word allegedly which was one of My bits you know so I mean there's Things like that and that you know he Might have given me credit some of the Time like this person said but you know He was you know taking my not just my Stuff but other people's stuff and then You know he was repackaging it and Presenting it to his group and then you Know in his group of people who heard Him talk about me positively you know Raved about me for years and now here I'm saying the worst possible things About me like like how do you reconcile That right like you know I mean like I Don't want any part of those people Either like you know who you can't see What happened here you can't see this Guy and so many of them

Are seeing him they just won't confront It because they're saying yeah you're Right about this I still love the guy But you're right they said we all know It like you know and he just doesn't Want to deal with it right and so I'm Not here to fix people or take on Burdens that aren't mine and so you know That's I mean for me it's been a Blessing and you know I didn't know that Going in but it is like I didn't you Know I didn't think this was going to be Something that would be better for me But it is And so you know that's where I stand on It hopefully this is it I don't feel Like I need to say anything more about This situation you know it's It's pretty much exhausted and I can now Move back on to my regular videos you Know and so and for that I'm grateful Only spiritual value will save this World it's Paul Romano definitely Reporting for the apocalypse and the Ascension everyone have a blessed day And be grateful

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